As I was loading the kids into the car this morning after agreeing that Andy could take the day to go surfing with the boys, I gave myself a high five because I had the dog walked, breakfast done, diapers changed and READY to go to the bank and get groceries by 9am. I was feeling pretty stoked and figured “I GOT THIS!” If I have purpose… it is this- I am gonna be the best Mom to these gremlins EVER! I literally felt on top of the world and that I couldn’t think of anything better to do today than mother these kids!

10 minutes into my inspired self talk… I get to the bank without my diaper bag and I’m out with a 2 year old and a 1 month old with no diapers, wallet, or nursing cover. I turn the car around and head back to the house to get my bag. I get back in the car and try the day again. I then walk into the bank to get my monthly budget and banking done only to realize that I’m at the wrong bank to withdraw the money from. Once I got to the right bank, I unloaded the kids but once I go into the bank, I forgot my wallet with the debit card in the car. From my previous blog, today was the day I took one step forward and 2 steps back HOWEVER; I managed to get both kids to nap at the same time again and had a hot bath to soak in my thoughts uninterrupted. My favourite time of day!

Now that the midwife appointments are wrapping up and Caleb has survived well his first month, I am now free to take time to myself during the days and Andy can take the littles. I need to re-focus, prioritize, meditate and center myself. It has been a real challenge balancing things between the both of us while maintaining SOME of our own personal identities and then trying to protect family time AND “married” time. Like I said, most of my personal time has been spent out at appointments and I really do not consider that self help time. The Jump from 1 child to 2 has been another HUGE adjustment. My blog posts, journaling and writing are things I used to be which I now am slowly trying to regain.

I have been considering hot yoga a couple of times a week and then on the off days going for light jogs (which I can include the kids if I have them to myself). Just minor ways to keep myself healthy and attempt to get some of my pre-baby body back during this busy season. Having children has been such a sacrifice I’ve realized in more than one way. During pregnancy, you sacrifice the activities you used to do. My hips during both pregnancies could not handle the impact during running, so I had to stop that pretty early on which was very hard for me. And the nausea was very hard to keep active at all anyways.

I’m not one to do “New Years Resolutions”… but I love writing letters to my future self/prayers for what the year holds and what I expect to see through. Andy and I are really on the verge of change this year with our growing family and the career opportunities he has had in the Yukon this past year. Our little house has certainly served its purpose, but we are in desperate need of a bigger space to call home. We seem to trip over Berry every 10 minutes and Andy is currently sleeping on the couch in our living room since I’m up every 1 1/2-2 hours nursing the baby. His zone is the toddler and my current zone is the baby.

The winds of change are just around the corner, but we are trusting God for his guidance all the way. Through our walk of faith, we KNOW that these seasons of being still and resting are generally followed by craziness. So I will hold fast and maintain contentment in my cozy little home.